VOA: ‘The worst day in my life’
The worst day of my life is the day that I learned that I had cancer.
It’s the day I learned I would be in the ICU for the next 6-8 weeks.
I’m not exaggerating.
I went from being a strong, confident, optimistic woman to someone who was so depressed and scared that I was on the verge of losing my mind.
I felt like the world was about to be destroyed, and I didn’t want to wake up from this.
After reading about the events of May 4, the day of the explosion at the World Trade Center, I began to realize the magnitude of what had happened to me.
I was still a young woman.
I didn´t know how to walk.
I still had so much work to do to get back to normal life.
The world needed me, and it didn´T want me.
After reading about all the news of the day, I was thinking, Why would someone like me do this?
I just didn´te want to be part of the problem.
I started to see the world through the lens of someone who had been attacked and injured, and who was desperate to escape.
I had seen what the world had done to my family.
I knew that someone else had suffered the same fate as me, but I had been so focused on my own life that I didn t know about the damage that was being done to the world around me.
Even after I regained consciousness, I didnt feel like myself.
I began worrying about how to go home, and about how I could get on with my life.
I started feeling suicidal.
I thought, I have nothing left to lose, but if I dont get on my feet and start living again, I wont be able to make it to my next job.
I couldn´t sleep at night, because my heart rate kept getting higher and higher.
My eyes started to hurt.
It was so overwhelming to think that I would die alone, like so many others who have suffered through this war.
I kept thinking about my parents, who were both in the hospital.
I wondered what they had been through.
I worried about my mother.
I told her that I just needed to get on, and that I loved her, but that I wanted to see her at home.
She wouldnt let me sleep that night, and she told me that I should get on her bed and get her to come and see me.
The next morning, I went to see my mother for the first time in a long time.
I sat down at her desk, and the tears in my eyes began to roll down my cheeks.
I looked up at her and said, I love you, but can I go back to sleep?
I got up from the chair and walked out of the hospital, where my parents had been waiting for me.
For the first few days, I cried like a baby.
My heart pounded and my hands trembled, but at the same time I was able to walk again.
I realized that this was a good thing.
I took my father to the mall, where he went through the motions of life.
He was in his underwear.
He looked up and down the street, thinking about how wonderful it was to have a job again.
He went home to take my mother to her job.
For six months, I worked hard, even if it was at night.
I even went to the movies.
I wanted the world to be great again.
It took me years to get there.
At the time, I still felt angry and alone.
But as I was learning to walk, I realized how much more wonderful life could be if I could start living my life again.
On June 5, 2008, I met my husband.
He has a career in financial planning.
We decided to move to Florida and get a house together.
We were fortunate to find a place that was easy to commute to and easy to walk to.
My daughter, who was six years old, came along with us.
My wife and I moved in, and my daughter is now in middle school.
We now have three grown children, and our oldest daughter is almost 15.
We have two dogs.
We are all in good health.
I don´t have any regrets about leaving New York City, and when I look back on the past six months I see that I have made the best of everything that has happened.
But I am not happy.
I have been so fortunate to be a part of this world.
I live in a small town in the middle of nowhere, and every single day I am thinking, If I had my way, my son would have been born in the United States.
But the day my son was born, I wanted him to live in America.
I would have made sure that he had a home, that he was able and cared for